it's not always the rider
Stumpyjock, you're right. Sometimes there really is no way out, and, as you say, the biker isn't always to blame.
My grandad lost his right leg to a drunk driver coming the wrong way round a roundabout one Christmas 'eve many years ago. Short of staying at home what could he have done? My father-in-law lost his left leg to a sawn-off shotgun. Short of scrounging, instead of taking that security job when the Sheffield steel industry collapsed, what could he have done? At least there's life after amputation...
Yes, there are dangerous roads, dangerous modes of transport, dangerous times of the year, dangerous occupations, etc.. but I think all of these dangers come down to individuals...
I realise I'm vulnerable, but I still choose to ride a bike daily, and sometimes I choose to ride those roads. I wish the government were doing something, anything, like more visible, more professional (and more expensive) roads policing, to address and influence the behaviour of individuals, rather that just installing the latest techno panacea wealth (and accident) re-distribution kit.
I'm really sorry for your loss and I hope you make a good recovery.