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Dec 10

Posts: 11880

preunit says:

10 Tips if you get pulled over pt1

This has been copied and pasted ie plagiarized,funny and true, mind.:smile

1. Attitude: The three 'offs'

Sat on your bike with the engine running and your (black) visor firmly shut is no way to greet a traffic cop that's just pulled you over. Switch off the bike, dismount, take off your helmet and look humble - even if you don't think you've done anything wrong.

2. Your bike

An illegal number plate, an ear-splitting exhaust, balding tyres and no tax aren't the best way to help smooth negotations get under way. Keeping your bike legal, roadworthy and clean shows you have some respect for the law. A minor traffic infringement could be overlooked if the rider's bike is legal but no insurance and a fag-packet number plate won't help matters one bit.

3. Location

If you're going to go out for a spirited ride then choose location wisely. If you're caught doing a few miles over the speed limit on an open A-road, with good visibilty it'll probably result in just a ticking off under the right circumstances. But if you're stopped hoiking stand-up wheelies past a school at home time then, to put it bluntly, you're fucked.

4. Don't argue

Avoid arguments. Most traffic cops are simply doing their jobs, so usually you'll have been pulled over for a particular reason, so look humble, take the bollocking and you may just get away with it. Backchat, sarcasm and a never-ending stream of "yes, buts" will get you nowhere. If you disagree then do it politely


5. Bribery

It may have happened in the 1970s, but a £50 note left in between your folded-up driving licence, accompanied by a cheeky wink won't get you anywhere other than a custody cell. Don't do it.



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  • Posted 3 years ago (26 June 2012 16:06)

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Dec 10

Posts: 11880

preunit says:

Part Deux

6. Be honest

Cops hate liars, so if you know you were doing 40mph in a 30 then admit it. "I've no idea why you stopped me, mate," are not words any traffic cop likes to hear, especially the word 'mate'. Be honest, admit you're in the wrong and you may just get away with it. Trust us on this one, it works.

7. Clothing

Torn jeans, a black visor, trainers, no gloves and a T-shirt won't impress anyone, least of all a traffic cop if you get pulled. Sensible clothing means you have some sense of self-worth and therefore respect the consequences of coming off your bike. Riding a GSX-R1000 dressed like someone out of the latest rap video generally means you haven't much of a clue about anything.

8. Be apologetic

An apology goes a long way in many coppers' eyes, but don't grovel. Remain calm, humble avoid challenging eye-contact and you're already easing the situation. Take the bollocking, be sorry and hope.

9. Slip away quietly

If you're lucky and you've followed some of the previous tips then you may find yourself riding away with a flea in your ear and your licence intact. If not, then accept the punishment and move on. But either way leave the scene quietly. Two-fingered salutes in the style of a wheelie, drag-start departure or peppering the officer's car with stones spat up by a smoking rear tyre (yes, it's happened) are all sure fire ways of getting yourself re-nicked.

10. Don't do a runner

AND FINALLY ... Make sure you pull over. 'Doing a runner' - as it's affectionately known - was relatively easy a few years ago, if you were on the right machine on roads you know well. Nowadays, 'failing to stop' will usually result in a 'Blues Brothers' high-speed chase by highly-skilled drivers in seriously fast specially-equipped pursuit cars. If things escalate include 'helicopter' and 'officers from three other counties' into the previous sentence. Expect a state holiday at one of Her Majesty's leisure camps, probably sharing a 'room' with someone called Big Butch McDick.


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Nov 04

Posts: 3830

750FLYER says:

Here here....

I agree with all of that..

But I have lost the cops twice!   :wink:

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Dec 08

Posts: 1535

Blader2005 says:


with it all.... be humble... smile politely and accept everything the officer says as gospel.... :biggrin:



I too lost the police......... but it was ok... i found them down the back of my sofa!!! lmao :blink:

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Jun 07

Posts: 5241

R100R says:

Attitude Test

A popular misapprehension is that you need to grovel to pass the 'attitude test'.  There is no need to pass an 'attitude test,' there is merely the requirement not to fail it.  Merely treating the officer with normal courtesy is enough to not fail the 'attitude test.'

Another popular misapprehension is that if a traffic officer was not bothering you he might be catching 'real criminals'.  Traffic officers are there to catch motorists while other police officers concentrate on catching the 'real criminals.'

Please note that a basic failure to recognise this 2nd point can often lead to a critical failure of the 'attitude test' and, in turn, lead an officer to give out points and fines which he might otherwise have withheld.:winkie:

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Oct 10

Posts: 160

Reynard says:


ask them if they haven't got anything better to do either, or call them 'sonny' me on this:laugh:

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Aug 10

Posts: 321

gaz1982 says:

I can't comment

I have not been pulled yet. But this thread does seem to have some good advice and input. When reading the post's imagining myself in that situation I see it more as common sense.

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Aug 11

Posts: 3732

babyrocket says:


every word of its true, but at some times all the best advice goes out the window,especially when they use snide tactics to make a collar.

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May 12

Posts: 127

Valko says:

agree and

try open face and smiling nobody likes grumpy bikers, one mind trick that really helps: thinking about something nice completely not related to the situation really helps to pull positive vibe in it (like girls in short skirts, cold beer, whatever will make your grumpy face look nice) and I am not joking here.


[This Reply has been modified by the Author]

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Feb 10

Posts: 872


..Do you know wht I've pulled your over?

"well, Officer, it because you CAN, you wear a uniform, ....and you were probably bullied as a child"

Is often tempting to say, But I have yet to try it

OR.."Well, officer, is is because're bored?"

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May 12

Posts: 41

DOLOMITE73 says:

top tips?

strike me that any idiot who needs these things pointing out to them, probably isn't going to take any notice anyway...

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