Life exists elsewhere

Shock news just in… a new exciting branch of motorsport has just been discovered – it’s called 250GP. Hitherto unknown to the motorcycling cognoscenti due to a bizarre and sinister wall of silence, this new branch of the sport shows none of the signs of the killer disease ‘F1 Canker’ known to have infected many sports from its roots in Formula One car racing and international football.

Discovered as recently as last weekend when I watched it on the telly before taking my Falco out as a better option than sitting through the final instalments of the Rossi vs the world show (we know he’s the best now so we don’t need to see the end) this new show has all the drama and slapstick of your local panto.

Baron Hardman is brilliantly played by a talented Spaniard called Lorenzo and in last week’s episode he took offence at an unintentional slight from another player and booted him right up the exhaust so he had to retire. The Baron was on his way to another foul victory when at the last gasp he was thwarted by the hero of our tale the good spanaird Alvaro.

Alvaro had sworn vengeance after the Baron had sulkily forced all the riders to ride in the wet while he slouched around in the pits, and with one mighty and righteous blow he sent the evil Baron into cat litter land where he was forced to plant a flag.